Tuesday, July 15, 2008


We had a really long vacation. I confess I am more stressed than I am telling anyone. I don't know how much of my struggle is money, the business, depression, or lack of giving it to God. I know it all stems from my relationship with Him, but the harder I try at everything the harder I fall it seems. For instance there is a person in my life that I really want to love and become closer to, but they always lash out in ways I have never experienced. The more I force it the worse I feel when I am hurt. I am quitting my anti-depressant so that plus all the other things is making me feel like someone else. So if I pull away and act distant don't let me. And now to lighten up the mood, this would all stop if my maid would come back. Oh wait I don't have a maid. Well, crap! I guess maybe I'll just have to start drinking.